March was tough. A sort of confused, in-between month. My eager forsythia, tempted to bud out way too soon, were lambasted by two feet of snow. The news felt no different.
My personal life felt like that, too. I’d thought my book was about to be done. But I saw a truer way through, I tossed it all up in the air again for another revision.
After months of clinging to a promising but in the end, insufficient relationship, I say goodbye. A sad ending with such a good man. And again, I felt the familiar loneliness of dinner for one.
There will be days like this, my Mama said. And weeks. Months sometimes. Promises and disappointment. Hopes dashed. Life bumps us around, and we have bruises to show for it.
But there are saving graces, too.
Before I went on a weekend retreat to complete a draft of my book, a friend recommended that, more than anything else, I just follow my appetite. He suggested I watch for the ways that I usually double-down and push through, and instead just be attentive to what I want, what ignites me. So I did.
I napped. After breakfast that first morning I read some of what I’d already written, and then took a nap! Really?! I had no idea how exhausted I was! But afterward I felt ready to edit. In a bit I realized I was getting cold… time to make a wood run. When I came back in, fresh from the outdoor chill, I was ready to re-articulate the introduction to my book.
For two days, I watched myself both follow my appetite and forget to do just that.
In my work with women over the past decade, three fallacies stand out as the prime killers of women’s turn-on. And they all have to do with time.
So think about your life now.
What causes you stress around time?
Because we think there’s not enough of it,
or that we always need to do more to move up the ladder,
or just because there’s just too damn much to cram into every day,
We run to the car or bus (and not just to burn a few extra calories).
We leave too little time between appointments, and then speed in a frenzy to get there.
This adrenaline driven life isn’t what allows for our feminine flow.
Then we resort to coffee and chocolate get us through the day when energy inevitably drops.
By dinnertime, there’s really nothing left for anyone, least of all, ourselves..
So today, experiment with not rushing.
Give yourself more spaciousness…
...permission to live like a queen instead of a slave to your life.
I'm birthing a new closed FB page... for any woman who longs to be free to flow in her feminine self. Right now it's just called Divining Beauty... but instead of doing this DIY, I thought it would be much more fun to have you help me name my new baby.
So this Sunday morning I'll gift the woman whose name I like best a free hour-long session with me.
Why am I launching this new platform? Because this is an important time for women!! Trouble is... the feminine doesn't have a chance in a culture that thinks abusive power is what is masculine! She's dissed, ignored, and shamed for being herself.
Mary is an intimacy coach, sensuality educator, spiritual counselor, and writer who leads retreats around the globe and privately coaches women and couples. All at the intersection of the sacred and the senses.